Church Etiquette

I’m not necessarily a religious person, but I do go to church every Sunday because of my parents. I’ve noticed I have a lot of pet peeves at church, especially when I attend baptisms, weddings, and quinceañeras. It’s obvious who goes to church regularly and who doesn’t. Anyway, here’s a little list I came up with of things you should and shouldn’t do at church. Most of these things just require common sense and respect to others.

• Arrive to the mass early or be there right when it begins. If you get there after the mass starts, you are a distraction. Also, seats tend to get full after a certain amout of time. Being on time to church will not only save you the embarassment of walking into a quiet room and heads turning to look at you with disgust, you will also have the freedom of choosing to sit near someone you know rather than a total stranger.
• Dress appropriately. I know my mom always tells me to wear my sunday best when I go to church, but nowadays more and more people are starting to dress casually for church. If you want to dress that way, it’s okay with me (as long as it’s accepted by the religion). Just don’t wear anything that you would wear to sleep like sweats, a tank top, a muscle shirt,  or an oversized t-shirt. And use common sense: don’t wear something that says “I’m with stupid.” In fact, try to avoid wearing anything with words or logos.
• Turn off your cell phones and electronic devices. Wait… Who am I kidding? No one turns their cell phones off anymore. Put them on silent. No, not vibrate. Silent. I know for a fact that if it vibrates, you will be tempted to sneak a look into your pocket to see who called or texted you.
• Don’t walk in and out of church during the service. Go to the restroom and take care of everything you need to take care of before the mass starts. On a similar note: don’t leave church early. That’s disrespectful.
• Try to avoid talking. If you talk, it implies that you’re not paying attention and disrespecting the word of God. Even if you don’t believe in what’s being said, have some respect for everyone else.
• Don’t chew gum. That’s just tacky.
• If you have small children, don’t feed them snacks. The opening of wrappers and chewing of food is annoying and distracting. (Also, I hope you have the sense not to be eating snacks yourself.)
• If you have a baby and it begins to cry, please take it outside. There’s something just not right about people who go to church against their will covering their ears to drown out the sound of a baby’s cries instead of the preacher’s sermon.

Oh, for the love of God.

I know that my parents like to practice Catholicism and all… but why is it they want us (their children, that is) to be the perfect Roman Catholics? I guess the way they were raised, religion was a big part of their life and they relied on it in various situations and circumstances. I know they still do look to God for help and work hard to get what they want. Even though I go to church every Sunday and do the sign of the cross every night before I go to sleep, I’m not sure if I can call myself a true Catholic. I’m not even sure I want to be a true Catholic. I don’t even know what it means or takes to be a true Catholic. I just happened to be born into a Catholic family.

Anyway, my parents tend to use God as an excuse to not let me be a normal, 21st century, American teenager. Soon enough, I’m not even gonna be a teenager. But as long as I’m still living here I know I’m still gonna be treated the same way. At one point I thought that they’d treat me differently as I got older… but I guess I was wrong. Not because I think I’m old enough to go out at night or whatever, but because I know my 22-year-old brother isn’t allowed out late either. Sometimes he’s outside the house hanging out with the weirdo neighbors and my mom tells me to call him and tell him to come inside the house because it’s late. Last time she told me to do this was on a Friday or Saturday night a bit before 10pm, and I said something like “Why? We don’t even have school tomorrow. Does it matter that he comes inside a little later tonight?” She just said something about how God wouldn’t want him out there that late and that he needs to be home because he’d just be out there saying “bad things.” I also remember this one time when a couple of my friends were over and we were planning on going to the movies together. I asked for permission and they said no. I asked why I couldn’t go, and they said that I couldn’t go because that is how God would want it. I get that they believe in God and all, but why would they say something like that? Would God really not want me to have a good time at the movies on a Friday evening with my friends?